This is called shi**ing my pants

So I have three kids. It's a good number. But in truth I have always been fond of even numbers. I know that's not a reason to have another baby, but it does cross my mind from time to time. So the last few weeks I have been feeling very thankful for what cool and amazing kids I have. How cool it is to get to know someone that you made, grew. It's like, you are the most awesome awe inspiring being ever and I am over the moon for you. I am so gay I cant handle it. To think that somewhere, maybe there is another one just waiting for the introduction, the chance. So anyways I blame these feelings on my ovaries and some sort of primal drive to procreate and do my best to just ignore them as the reasons to not have another baby are numerous and plentiful and the reasons too are well bizarre, even numbers? For pete's sakes get a hold of yourself.

Today we had a family gathering to celebrate the January birthdays. I was not super thrilled about a family gathering as I had resolved to hate my sister in law forever and the energy it was going to take to be nasty to her all afternoon was going to make me tired and quite possibly unpleasant at work. Not fair to my coworkers, right? The afternoon so far was fine, I was aloof, distant and happily eating yummy all butter food when my husband walked into the living room holding the new baby, traitor he always sells me out. The normal jesting of brothers spawned the question of when is he going to have another baby...and here is where her dropped the bomb and I shi* my pants. Coming out of the mouth of a man who had previously stated that he would rather be a eunuch than have another baby, would prefer to do his own vasectomy than have another baby was not quite sure. yup, still gay.Now to most this would not be a big deal. I have from time to time joked about the prospect and have been greeted with a hell no. He says it in a silly way but he means hell no. So the fact that he said he wasn't sure and the fact that he wasn't kidding is terrifying.
So I wonder is there a baby in our future? I am SSSOOOO lesbian. I have spent most of my life trying like crazy to not get pregnant, the idea of doing it on purpose makes my heart race.