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Monday, April 20

A few of my favorite things....people really.





Thursday, April 16

Yin Xhi

A baby girl is born. A fortune is told and a future is decided. This girl is bad luck and will not live. She must be given away. Her mother cannot let her go. Her father dies, he is killed. Her mother gives this child away, she has no choice. For her to remain would make the luck worst. To keep this baby girl from being haunted and her children from being haunted she must pass on her fathers name to her children and her grandchildren.



A little girl loses her father. A woman loses her husband. They are both lost. They travel far, for many many years. A mother gives her daughter a gift, a jade Buddha that means very much to this little girl. There are secret markings and the girl knows it hers from the moment she receives it. It lays hidden safe in her dresser drawer. She knows this Buddha.



A hopeful grandfather travels to Taiwan and finds the most beautiful Buddha holding a sweet fat baby boy. He buys this Buddha as a gift for his daughter in law.
He is hoping for a grandson, she a son.



Home flies this Buddha into the hands of the daughter in law. What ever will I do with this Buddha? I am not a Buddhist. I will give it to my friend who is. Buddha and the baby boy leave her house. She still waits for a boy.


Buddha takes another trip as a gift to a friend. A grandmother, a mother. She opens the gift and then it is too late. Once you accept the gift it is yours. What will I do with a boy child the grandmother wonders? She is filled with worry. Who will bear this boy child? Not my granddaughter she hopes. This granddaughter is lost. She is looking for her path and it does not yet glow bright enough for her to see. Grandma hopes he will not have to be her light. She has seen once before how hard it is for a child to be that light. She does not want it to be that way again.



The little girl is big now. Grown with her own family. She is having another baby. Her mother is so happy, secretly relieved. And positive it is a boy. The girl hopes that her mother is right. But she is only 6 weeks pregnant. Time will only tell.


His mothers belly is full with water and he grows and grows. He is born and all is perfect. He is fat and round with slits for eyes. Th mother laughs as all along she teased this will be the Chinese baby. She loves him. This child is from the water. His name is chosen and it means from a brook. He is given his grandmothers maiden name. A small gift for all that the grandmother has done and given.


Grandmother sees the baby and knows. This is where the boy child was going. His Chinese name is Yin Xhi, Buddha's happiness. Buddha makes one more trip and finds home. It is the girls favorite Buddha she knows from the moment she sees it.

The little girl and the mother are not so lost. They are togeather.

It's my mom's fault, she's crazy and Chinese.

The things WRONG with today...

  • Katie had swim lessons and was super cute. Despite the fact the man next to me said "WOW she's sure got alot of energy."

Why yes she does, and your ass crack is showing.

  • Kia stuck her hand in her armpit and then smelled it. In public, very very public. Oh no you didn't I say. She said she was just checking to make sure she had deodorant on.

Gross and Wrong.

  • The job at Darren's work officially ends 6 weeks from now. The dreaded posting has occurred. They expect them to train their replacements. Another brilliant idea.

I bet those suckers get the best training ever.

  • Where the hell is all the discount Easter candy? I have been to three targets in search of 50% off Cadbury eggs and other yummy easter candy. NONE. I have however spent like $200 on things I didn't need.

I should have just paid full price for the damn eggs, would have been cheaper.

The complaining is done. Alas the sun is out and the baby is asleep. What more could I need?

Tuesday, April 7

oh my.





So I will admit. I was like dude I have this mothering thing down. Katie is yes delightful, busy, energetic. But that was ok. We managed.


I never realized how much time and patience it required. Now I do.
As I am lacking in both.
The two girls are making me blooming nuts! They fight non-stop. Katie is whining and crying alot. And being very very naughty and needy. I know this is "Normal". 

"Normal" is still making mamma crazy!! 
I have found that normal is not comforting. It resolves nothing. It gives you no suggestion for improvement. It does not make anything less annoying or frustrating. 

I have faith that things will settle in but I do find myself wondering why did I take her out of Kindercare? What do we really need money for? Couldn't we have cut something else? 

Anyone have any ideas? I hate feeling like it's all punitive for her. How do we get back on the good wagon? I have been very very bad.  Letting her watch the Simpsons on Hulu so she will be good. And LOTS of movies. And junk food. Like butterfingers for breakfast. And lunch too. 

We won't even start in on how neglected Anna is. Poor girl. I am counting on resilience for that one.
 Boy oh boy they lie, when they say what is one more? 
A WHOLE LOT!