Door #3?

So my life is not going quite how I imagined it would. 

Funny how some people get love, other people children, wealth. 

How is it decided what you'll be lucky in? Do we have a choice? If so can I please get the instruction manual or some vague directions?

Some instructions for life in general would be wonderful. 

Like which door? 

Door number one:

Married. A sad broken marriage that I am not sure anyone benefits from. Two parents, two incomes. Occasional vacation to Mexico. Not having to split holidays. The kids knowing who will look after them at night and in the mornings, I can't go so far as to say reliable childcare. Bickering and stress. Frustrations, lies, sadness. Joint liability for his actions and the potential costs and consequences of that. Alone and broken hearted. 

Door Number two.

Blissful, if only temporary, relief from the chaos. Financial ruin, possibility of living in an apartment. Having to move the kids and disassembling their lives. Listening to crying at night because they are used to having their dad around. Divorced. Girlfriends, new wives and stepmothers. Dating, boyfriends, step dads. Split holidays and more drinking. Alone and broken hearted. 

Isn't there always a door number three?  I need to find that door. One with a better prize behind it. Or at least a better life.

One with civility. Some kindness and cooperation. Some compassion perhaps. A little sobriety and the chance for some love. A lotta hard work. Happy children. A savings account, staying in our house and maybe turning it back into a home. 

Door #3 for me....

Momma is a Winner

I slept all day today which is awesome, except now I am awake. And it's like 1 am. But anyway as it goes on my "change" day I cleaned house and did laundry. Once the kids were asleep I decided to go do all the errands the kids complain about, like the bank and gas station. I called Kia and she wanted to come so I grabbed her and we bopped around. Naturally we needed some pie and there really aren't many 24 hour places in town. So we went to this bar that happens to have pie, but oh so sad she couldn't come inside. So I ordered pie to go and here is where I am a WINNER. I really wanted to have a nice little drinky drink. But for some reason it just felt wrong to be in a bar at midnight, drinking with a kid in the car and it's freezing outside and I turned the car off. So no drinky for me. But I did get pie.

Catch me if you can.

Crystal Springs Garden is so beautiful. Full of ducks and geese.
And wonderful fall colors.
The stare off. This goose was super aggressive and snatched the bag of food from Katie. I was trying to figure out how to get the goose to goose him, no such luck.
Now they are making friends. 
The goose followed her around as long as she had food. 

Our Geo Cache...the goose wondered if it could eat it.

My favorite baby!
Safari Sam's is awesome. They loved it!
Upside down boy. Good tooth shot.
Who's happier?

The Cast of Characters.

Happy mom Happy baby. The Cutest turtle I have ever seen!!
Alice, Kitty and Angel.
There's a vampire there too, she just refused to be in the photo. Stinker
The Naughty Angel. Actually the most saintly of us all.
Our fearless leading and navigator through the dense suburbia.
My vampire with a Foo-Man-Chu. 
The Cat Herder.
Uhm. Hmm. Doofy the eighth dwarf.
Kung-fu Angel.
Scary pumpkin...Carved by me!

The thing that pissed me off today.

If I sat down and made a list it would be remarkably short. It was a nice day. Beck napped, I worked on my to do list, screwed around on Facebook and even ran some errands. I heard the entire family history of a woman at Walmart who was also waiting to return some items. Oddly enough she just made me realize how lucky I am and her life wasn't even bad. Baked cupcakes with the kids, got beat at two games of Go Fish and came home to my mom cooking for me. Finished dinner and remarked at how incredible Katie is, she's reading to me. It blows my mind. We laughed about heaven being covered in chewed up poopy diapers, that would be Milo's (our dead dogs) idea of heaven. I was looking forward to complaining to my husband about my mother in law. Just a normal day. 

But I am sitting here mad and frustrated by my lying husband. Damn I hate being lied to. Mostly because I feel like he must think I am an idiot. Perhaps I am.

When I have nothing witty to say.

Bath time.
6 Hands.
Being sick has been awesome for the dark circles under my eyes. I haven't slept this much in years. Really.
Ohh poor flu baby.
Pumpkin patch in my rabbit hunting hat.
He who refuses to smile.
Oh wait I will smile at the pumpkin, not at you.
Just before this picture her cruel sister told her a spider landed on her from above. It took alot of coaxing to get her to take the picture. I love the super fake smile.
The pumpkin stage at fir point farms. Oh my gosh, the best donuts ever. Eat them warm and then have some Apple Pie Fries. You may promptly die from a heart attack but you'll die happy. And full.
Notice the hair caught in the up draft.
Perfect pumpkin weather. Rainy, windy cold and overall mucky. Perfect.
No amount of cropping seems to be enough when there are photos of me in a bathing suit. Be distracted by the super cute baby. 
Ohhh Ahh. Much better. Am I up to something naughty in my swim diaper??
Why Yes I am.

Uh whatever. They say the girls get it from me. I offer this as evidence to the contrary.
Katie took this picture so that the next time she wanted to log into Darren's computer she could copy his password. She was giggling behind us, feeling so clever. I love her. She CRACKS me up. At least we know how many letter to try.
Oh Happy Boy. I love him.

Sunday fun. Or sorta.

I think she could be mine. Should be rather. She would blend right in. And could set and example for my other kids. My naughty kids. But I still love my naughty kids. I love that they would NOT cooperate for pictures. That they would rather play and ignore my every command. I love that when Beckett cries he looks like a white blond Chinese baby. I love how Haddie looks at Darren like an odd circus animal that shouldn't be trusted. How correct she is. I love that sometimes my girls will play together nicely. It's rare so it must be cherished.

Pictures.

Oh my.

Sick Sick Sick. 

It sucks sucks suck. 

It started with Anna, then me and now Beck. I'd rather be sick three times over than have my babies suffer. 

On the upside I now have time in the middle of the night to blog when I am wakened by a puker.